I've even gone so far as to give it considerable thought, thinking of how I would go back to the beginning. All the way back. If you're family, you pretty much know everything...I think. It's possible that no one really knows. I'm not much for putting my personal drama out there on my Facebook feed, after all, most people only share their highlight reel, and the select few who do post dramatic posts are usually posting passive agressive, ultra vague posts that you would only understand if you were the offensive party.
The truth is, I'm not sure anyone really wants to hear my story. But an even harder truth is that while maybe I don't consider the things I went through as being exceptionally hard, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. That is what makes me want to share. Because what if there's someone that heard my story and it helped them break out of the misery they are in, it would be worth it.
If I do decide to put it out there, it would probably be a book. I've decided it would take me way too many blog posts and I wouldn't want to split it up like that (plus, what if I don't make it through?). Of course, maybe the desire for writing a book comes from the fact that I'm now married a wonderful writer and am in the process of helping him edit and republish his first 2 books. I can do it too, right?
Anyway....I decided after looking back on my blog I've skipped ahead. The last post I made was in 2012! We had just moved into my dream house a few months before, and life was looking better (or so I told myself). I met some of the most wonderful people when I moved into that house. The best neighbors a person could imagine. The kids made some great friends who are sure to be lifelong friends. The house was beautiful, close to everything, just the right distance in between work and the kids' school.
In late 2012 the switch finally flipped. I decided I just couldn't live the same vicious cycle in my marriage anymore. The divorce was final in April of 2013, almost exactly 13 years after we got married. Life was anything but boring for the next year or so, I learned a LOT about boundaries, living on my own for the first time ever, and attempting to co-parent the kids. I say attempt because it's nearly impossible to CO-parent with an alcoholic who isn't capable of taking care of himself, much less 2 kids. I realized I had pretty much been a single parent all along.
On a Sunday afternoon in March last year I met my soulmate. If you haven't heard how we met, it's such a good story, and I'm going to write a whole post about just that. It's a real life fairy tale....well, I think so anyway. I still have to pinch myself some days to make sure the last year and a half hasn't been a dream. We had a date night last Friday night since we had a rare night with no kids. We don't get out much, but that's okay with both of us. We went to the Riparian Preserve, a local park with lots of ponds, fishing, ducks and various other birds. Miles of trails make for great exercise and it's a really pleasant place for quiet conversation (us quiet...not likely). Afterwards we went and had some of our favorite pizza, ate too much of it lol, and once we got home we cuddled up to watch some Homeland. Here's a pic of us on the date...