A few people missed out on this post, so I thought I would edit it and republish it, since it was one of my favorites.
Sometimes I find out things about people on my route that I would rather not know.
One day I met this lady's son who is in the navy and was getting ready to leave for Afghanistan. He seemed like a very nice person. A few weeks later she gave me a package to mail that was obviously going to him, and it had the necessary customs form attached. As I was waiting in line to buy stamps I was looking at the package and noticed the customs form. It said it included the following: Hemorrhoid cream, hemorrhoid cushion, one playgirl subscription form, condoms, and a few other miscellaneous things. I was pretty sure it was a joke, and we all had a really good laugh about it. I never asked.
There's this catalog that a few people get. It's called Under Gear, ever heard of it? I hadn't either until recently. It's basically a male version of Victoria's Secret. The problem with the catalog is that they have pictures like this on their back cover:
You can also check out their website for more interesting pictures, we've all had a pretty good laugh at some of them. Anyway, sometimes when you know the person who's on the receiving end of the catalog, it kind of makes you wonder.
And there's this guy, who's married, that gets it. W.E.I.R.D. (okay, maybe it's for his wife's enjoyment, but somehow I don't think so....)
(not that there's anything wrong with the catalog, it just invokes a little silliness from us)
There is this other guy at work that also lives on my route. He is a frequent eBay shopper. Always getting packages, baseball cards, movies, computer memory, normal stuff. First, I have to say that lately, I've been having some problems with my ears, they are a little plugged and everything sounds a little muffled.
So anyway this guy wanders up the other day and starts telling me about how he's waiting on another package. He always tells me what he ordered, sometimes he shows me when he opens it, like the baseball cards.
This time I thought he said he ordered some "penis razors".
What's a penis razor?! Did I hear that right?
You really have to know this guy, it's almost the kind of thing he would say.
I guess when I didn't say anything right away, he must have wondered what I was thinking, because he's like, "I know they're women's razors, but I really like them and they're so much cheaper than Wal-Mart."
So then I'd had a minute to think about it and I realized he said VENUS RAZORS.
Now that I can handle.